That first horrible day comes back to me like it happenedyesterday, with all the pain and humiliation stabbing me in the breastlike Ophelia's dagger--or was that dagger somebody else's, what's-his-name, the black guy who stabbed her? He didn't? He did? Well,whatever.The beginning of the end came when I was working in my office and thephone rang. It was a call from Michelle. "It's Michelle Cleaver. Doyou remember me?" she asked sweetly.It took me a while, but I said, "Yes, of course!" Stalling."I have a surprise for you, Paul, if you will come down to the trainingroom." You're in the building, here at Unger--?" I am," she said, laughing, interrupting me. "I told you it was asurprise. Now get your cute little ass down here now, sweetie." Andwith that, she had slammed the phone down.I sat there in my office for a while, shaking, scared to death.Michelle was not the type to say such a thing. Did she have a team ofnut-cutting lawyers waiting for me in there? And how the fuck. I hope you like cunnilingus.”“I love being eaten!” This certainly turned out to be the truth!When we emerged there was a note on the kitchen table:“We went out to get a pizza. We’d have waited but… You guys sure know how to stretch it out, especially for old people!”Sara actually blushed when she read her son’s note.“They certainly sound smug for two newly deflowered ex-virgins.”“I guess. Missy’s probably already planning the colors of the bride’s maids’ dresses. I hope she’s planning to wait until after David graduates. Are you ready to be the mother of the groom? Missy’s got an aunt and an aunt-in-law, but you’re going to be the big cheese. I expect she’ll be asking your opinion about everything. Knowing my granddaughter she’s going to make you her surrogate mother. Anyway, a sixteen year old might not be too young to get married, but she’s definitely too young to plan it. You plan everything. I’d rather just write the checks. Don’t worry about expenses. Within.
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