”I was long past trying to suppress the feeling, trying to make moral sense of it all, trying to convince myself that I shouldn’t be doing this. It was wrong. I knew damned well it was wrong. I just didn’t seem to care.“No one will know?” I kept telling myself. I let myself really enjoy what I was doing.Playing with myself was the closest thing to a ‘sexual act’ that I’d done for some time. I was really feeling the desire now, the raw lust.The fact that Brian was getting so much pleasure from it only motivated me more. It made me feel good to give him so much pleasure.Brian was starting to have a hard time lying still. He became more vocal and more… …enthusiastic… …as he watched me.“Oh God Mom! Jezz! This is awesome!” He mumbled while he squirmed around. “Are you going to stop?”I looked at him. That seemed such an odd question. I had no idea what he meant.“I mean, are you gunna do it ‘til I…’til I…”“Until you cum?”He shook his head; a series of little jerks of his head.“You want me. ”I was not for sure but I think he might have meant he was a coward because he had runaway thinking about what he had done to me that night. There was a knock at my door and this time it was grandma, she asked to come in and I left her inside my bedroom.“ANN is something wrong?” Grandma asked coming over to me.“Was Jack a coward in Vietnam?” I asked her.Grandma asked in return, “Why do you ask Ann?”“Just tell me grandma,” I replied.Grandma looked to Janet then to me as she said, “You two come with me,” as she walked from my bedroom.Grandma walked us down into a room I always thought was her sewing room. She stopped and reached into her pocket and pulled out a key. She used it to unlock the door to that room. As the door swung open, I saw it was a boy’s bedroom. Grandma walked in with us behind her.“This was Jack’s room as he stayed with us on weekends as a boy,” Grandma said to Janet and me.Grandma walked over to a dresser and on top of it sat a display glass. I saw it had medals and.
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