The physical and emotional reconnection was wonderful.And after we made love we inevitably discussed Lagos and our plans for life back in New York. We both felt comfortable that we’d made the right decisions. Genuinely we felt like a couple in love exploring the depths and hinterland of our true sexuality. For twenty plus years we’d been doting parents and young professionals building our careers. now with Donovan grown and flown, we wanted to break free and enjoy whatever we jointly thought would excite and enrich our lives. That’s how we both felt.We were both still deeply in love and committed to each other, but we both wanted to explore together. Like two intrepid explorers heading upstream to the unexplored headwaters of our sexual fantasies. With me finally started to own my true inner self. A man who enjoyed sharing his wife. With Sue slowly shaking off the shackles and beliefs of a conservative Nebraskan upbringing. Now keen to explore, safe in the knowledge that I’d be there. Gilly gave him a sad look. “Have you heard even a word of what I’ve been saying? We are already dying. Saving us from withdrawal of the Blue only lengthens our downward spiral. The priests continue to hunt and kill us, our elders retreat further into their fortress of silence, and my people dissolve into smaller fiefdoms of grubbing ignorance. Unless we change, passing the test in the Waste is meaningless.”Porter had a terrible foreboding that he had just thrown away his life for nothing. Had he finally given in to the hero delusion, believing that he could rise from his humble grey desk of yore to become a champion? Even if he passed the test, was his gesture spitting into the wind?“Sometimes I hate it when you’re so smart,” Porter said loud enough for Gilly to hear.That night Porter had trouble falling asleep. Finally coming to a resolution in his mind he poked at Gilly lying next to him, waking her up if she had managed to sleep during his tossing and turning. In the moonlight.
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