They were. It was deep.The look Joan shot across the patio to Doug after I’d shared my observations all but confirmed every aspect of what I thought.Joan’s curse and comment, ‘We were trying to be good’, showed to me that they were also trying to hide the obvious by socializing with others.I probed, “How long?”Joan looked down at the ground and softly said, “Almost two years.”“Love?”“Oh, yes. But we know we have to change – to allow others in. I’m so sorry. Please don’t say anything to anyone else. This evening was the first time out together in a real social situation. Now, I know, we have to be more careful.”I reached over and held her hand. “Joan, I like you a lot. I don’t mind sharing you with Doug ... if you don’t mind sharing me with Penny and Misty.”Her head jerked up, “What? What do you mean?”“I mean that the girls and I seem to have the same kind of relationship with each other that you have with Doug.”Joan’s eyes flared. “Sexual?” she whispered. Her eyes pleaded for a. To my Mom's credit, she was able to shield my Dad from the fact that the majority of her days were being spent with her son attempting to find guys to have sex with her. I was starting to get frustrated though, even more so as I could start to tell my Mom was feeling relieved with each passing day. It was obvious that she was simply going through the motions to some degree; she was likely terrified of getting fucked in front of me but even more afraid of betraying the deal we had made. Though we continued to try Chat Avenue, I was ready to extend our search. I started browsing seedier porn sites without my Mother's knowledge. I had arrived at the point where I didn't really care where the guy came from or how involved she was with finding him, I just wanted some form of control over my Mom. I posted detailed messages about the situation from my own perspective on half a dozen websites to start, and got way more feedback than my Mom did on Chat Avenue. Guys apparently loved hearing.
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