“Dammit, why can’t we be fucking?” I suddenly yell. After sitting on the couch for about five straight hours, I try to get to up but she’s sleeping against my shoulder. I softly push her over to the other side of the couch and get up. I feel my knees buckle as I stretch out the cramps in my body. As all the joints in my body begin to crack and pop, she wakes up and slaps me on the ass. “Go get me some water,” she politely tells me. I don’t even look back at her. I just chuckle and fart in her direction. As soon as my fart ends, I move into the kitchen before she can retaliate. I walk over to the fridge and grab two bottles of water. As I turn around, she knees me in the stomach and takes one of the bottles out of my hand. I slowly follow her back into the living room, in such pain that I’m not even looking at her ass. She pushes me on the edge of the couch and then sits on top of my back. She grabs the remote and begins flipping through channels while squishing me further into. After staring at it for a few more minutes, she handed me back my pants with out taking her eyes off my legs. I slipped them on and stepped into my shoes. As soon as I snapped my button and pulled up my zipper, the spell was broken and she looked me right in the eyes."So," I began timidly. "do I have to look for another job, or are you gonna keep this quiet?" I'll keep your secret." She began.Mental note to self: 'self: double prayers tonight and an extra helping in the collection plate on Sunday.'"As long as you do what I say, that is."Again I was speaking to the precocious child. "What do you mean?" Even I could her the fear in my voice."You're gonna wear them tomorrow. And you're gonna show me. And the next day, and the next and the next." That's it?" I asked. "Just show you that I've got them on and you'll keep this quiet?" This wasn't my idea of a perfect ending, but at least it was a freakin' bone."Yep, that's it, till I think of something else."Notice - insert sound of other.
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