Rebecca and Colleen joined me at least part of the time, but I was still away from home and my children far too much, and staying home would suit me just fine.No one, and I mean NO ONE, would believe me if I tried to explain myself, so I kept my mouth shut, worked hard to perform at the top of my game, and put my personal challenges aside.My phone rang ten minutes later, and well before I needed to be on the field for batting practice. "HEY!" It was my other lawyer, Mr. Bell. "What's this I hear? Are you really too valuable to send home for the playoffs?" Mr. Bell. It is so good to hear your voice."I am told that a certain unnamed pitcher, named Rawley Crewson, got his butt in a wringer because he liked to play with other men's wives, resulting in a most inconvenient broken arm. A certain Major League Manager is apoplectic about it, but is keeping me until they find someone that qualifies as a roster exemption, for the playoffs." Brian," Mr. Bell said. "Don't sell yourself short. I. But you’re thirty years too late.”I raised my head. “Look at me. I’m an old woman.”He looked at me, long and hard.“You’re beautiful.”“I was,” I said. “I was beautiful – once. That photo I sent you? That was me – thirty years ago. I was beautiful then.”The silence dragged on until I said, “You can leave whenever you want, James.”“Not until you let me fuck you silly. You promised.”“Oh, James! I lied to you, don’t you get it? I let you think I was young, I was beautiful, I was sexy.“I’m not my avatar. Any of them.”He sat quietly for a long time, then said, “Do you really think so little of me?”“What do you mean?”“Did you ever tell me your age?”“I…”“Did you ever tell me you were beautiful?”“I…”“And as for sexy – do you remember how many times I’ve said that the biggest sex organ in the body is the brain?”I slumped back. “All the fucking time.”“And do you remember when you told me that I’d be disappointed if we ever met?”“Well, aren’t you?”He shook his head. “Do you remember what I said.
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