"Tomorrow morning, I'll take them to soccer practice, tomorrow afternoon, the matinee movie showing of 'Finding Nemo' and then on Sunday, we'll go to the zoo with ice cream afterwards." Ken liked taking his kids to soccer practice. While the other fathers were out on the golf course Saturday mornings, Ken was at the soccer field. Besides being with his children, he was there with all of the 'Soccer Moms.' He even nailed a couple of them. Ken thought of himself as the 'Last Great White American Stud.' He envisioned himself a 'Johnnie Wadd' who had a thirteen and a half inch cock when in reality he was more like the four and a half inch little white weenie of Pee Wee Hermann. You remember 'Johnnie Wadd, ' don't you? That was John Holmes' stage name in his early porno movies. Ken envisioned himself as God's gift to women."I swear, Ken. You are gonna spoil our kids rotten."Her husband chuckled good-naturedly. "Yea, but no more than your mom and dad do. Besides, I have a ton of fun with. ” “I know who I am.” “I said, ‘find out more.’ I know you know who you are, but there’s more that you don’t know. I can see that.” She knew he was right and it thrilled her to feel seen in a way that only she saw herself and no one else had a clue about. She remembered wanting to be an actress, how exciting it felt to be on the stage and dream about being on Broadway, or in the movies, but she put that dream aside when she married Martin, then gave birth to Melissa and kept up with the responsibilities of keeping a home, a husband, a child, a challenging job. Here she was, almost fifty-five, married for thirty four years to a good man, her best friend, but now she was sitting across from a man she just met that afternoon, a stranger, contemplating having an affair. It was an outrageous thought, something out of one of her romance novels, something she’d thought could never happen to her in real life, but one she now knew she wanted—and the thought frightened her. “I can’t,” she.
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