He watchedher as she slept, curled up in the fetal position.Coldly, he walked over, lifted the edge of the blanketfrom her face and slapped her hard in the face whilegrabbing her by the hair.“Did I give you permission to take a shower, you filthycunt?” he growled.She slowly opened her eyes, forgetting for a momentwhere she was, and for the first time in her life, shelooked up to see her Master’s face. Despite the angrylook in his eyes and the pain she felt from his hand inher hair, she smiled widely at him. “Hi, Sir,” she saidand then she sighed contentedly.This wasn’t the reaction he was expecting. He pulledher up, her body struggling to keep up as he draggedher to the floor by her hair. He forced her to kneelwith her head on the ground and her ass in the air.“Don’t you ever look at me without my permission, youworthless fucking whore!” He unbuckled his belt andslid it through the loops of his pants, folded it overand began. ." said Nat, her voice sounding more thoughtful than ever. It was a nice idea, in a way, to be free of the social restrictions of sex and gender. To be something else, not able or willing to return. "To have nobody remember..."Nat would, on the whole, willingly give up her current life for that kind of existence. The link with the colony's systems and stores would be little more than a fringe benefit. While being truly female was Nat's dream, and always had been, she was becoming uncomfortably aware of the chance that it was impossible."Do I want to be female, or just androgynous?"Nat tried her best to ignore that kind of doubt. It only depressed her more than usual, and made her feel that she was making progress in the wrong direction, that she was denying what she, on some basic level, knew was her true nature. Nat knew she was deluding herself. She just didn't know whether she was deluding herself in favour of, or against, her transsexuality. Possibly both. Still, some evidence.
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