It was terrible to see her mother prostrating herself so abjectly. The woman had towered over her when she was a c***d, demanding deference, conformity, and instilled fear. Having the woman debase herself shook her up. 'You would have thrashed me if I behaved so disgracefully,' Ayesha shouted at her.'Yes! You are right, my mother would have thrashed me. I should be thrashed, yes, that's only right,' her mother agreed. Ayesha figured her mother's guilt had been assuaged, now that she had cried so emotionally. Ayesha plonked herself on the sofa, feeling weak from having her world turned upside down. Her mother had always been a tower of strength, and the outburst of raw emotion had rocked her to the core. Her mother walked back in, with a leather strap. The leather was thin enough to sting, and thick enough to hurt.'You must punish me, Ayesha, I deserve nothing less, and you are the only one who can do it,' Ishrat said,'Well, I don't know about that. I'm the only one who knows how bad. And by now we were at school and we headed together to our form room.Helen was bubbly and chatty as always and we talked telly, with Katie and the others trying to chime in.Then that lunch time I rushed off to the library. It was empty. I was a bit gutted and was a bit overwhelmed with a loneliness. But, nothing better to do, I stood outside by the door and waited. Alice was coming across the quad towards me.“Are you stalking me?”” she asked.From the tone and neutral face I couldn’t tell if she was joking. I asked if she wanted to eat with me.She countered coolly “You aren’t going to pretend you can’t remember where the canteen is again, are you?”I fished some sandwiches out of my bag and held them up swinging in front of her face. She suddenly cracked an unwilling small smile as though she couldn’t help herself.“Oh ok.” she surrendered, sounding exasperated, like I was a naughty puppy, and she led me off across the game field to some benches on the far side.We walked in comfortable.
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