When I was done with both of them, Jaye got up on spread knees, put her hands behind her head and told me to kneel at her side as I did her front. A crowd started to gather. We weren't doing anything at that point that lots of other couples weren't, but apparently word of Jaye's antics had gotten around and folks wanted to see what was going to happen. My hands shook as I ran them over her breasts and pointy nipples. I had been doing this for over a week but always as her husband – now I was doing it as a cuckold. From her breasts I moved down her belly, stopping at her mound. Back up to her breasts, cupping them, pulling the nipples out and stretching her breasts out for the approval of the audience, dragging them down until they jumped free. Back down over her belly to her mound. Down one thigh and back up to her mound, then down her other thigh and back up. I cupped my hand over her pussy, my fingers spreading the oil over her dangling clit and labia. "Do that again, B! And shake. I don't know what it is, but whenever I see her, it's like I get this strong urge to get close again with her. It only lasts when I'm looking right at her, or right after, when I'm still thinking about her. I feel this strong attraction." You just love her. Why don't you admit it?" I'm not sure that explains it, Kate. I'm not saying that I don't love her. It's just that seeing her triggers my feelings to a whole different level. Turns it up, like the volume on the television. It's like I love her a little bit all the time, but when I see her, it gets a lot stronger. It scares me sometimes, because I can't even explain it to myself." If you still love her, why don't you want me to tell her?" Because her mom and her therapist think she's better off without me. I think that too. When we are together, I do what I want to do with her. She lets me too, and then I guess we both wind up feeling bad about it. When you love someone, being together should be good for both of you. That isn't how.
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