So I grabbed an old, tired looking employee and said “These vegetables are for my wife. Have they been sprayed with any poisonous chemicals?” “The produce guy looked at me and said “No. You’ll have to do that yourself”.Dave had just returned from his honeymoon and was settling down in their new apartment. Coming home from work one night, the landlady met Dave in the hallway. She said “I have a couple of extra tickets to a play in town tonight, and I wonder if you and your new bride would like to have them?” “I’ll ask her” Dave responded. He opened the door to his apartment and called out “Honey, would you like to see ‘Oliver Twist’ tonight?” “No way!” his bride retorted. “If you show me one more trick with that thing, I’m going home to my mother!”Donald Trump was looking for a call girl. He found three such girls in a local pub, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. To the blonde he said “I am the President of the United States. Now how much would it cost me to spend some time with. I have a feeling it's someone in the prosecutor's office because he knew too damn much for it to be anyone else. I don't know what it's all about but it has cost too many innocent lives already. Did they take down Chuck and the others?" Yes, I'm afraid they did, even the cook who wasn't even part of the team. Dammit, I just lost a good friend and you can bet there is going to be hell to pay over this. Harry, this is Lt. Spears and he and his team are your ghosts for the rest of the night or until I deem it safe enough to release them. You will be in charge but he has almost as much experience in this stuff as you so I would listen to his suggestions if it were me. I have a team coming in to clean up the mess and again, you and Sandra will be moved tonight. I'm sorry but I don't know what else to do until I can get all this unscrambled. They have a chopper outside for you so if you have anything you need to take with you, better grab it. The ride will be a short one and I promise a.
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