Yes, that’s right, you read correctly, thirty minutes. I am parked up at a local woodland enclosure. People use this for the occasional walk; to clear their heads, to take their dogs for a walk and to admire the tall pine trees and nature in general. There are squirrels here; shame they are not the red variety as I find them to be far more appealing than their grey counterparts. At the moment it’s drizzling with rain; not heavy, just that fine drizzle that the English countryside is famous for this time of year. I bite my lip as I look out of the window of my car. We are going to get wet in this but there is one saving grace, there are no other cars around, just mine at the moment. The glass is beginning to steam up and I put on some loud music and activate the demister. Occasionally I let the windscreen wipers do their job and I wait it out. A car pulls into the park and my heart jumps out of my body; thank god for the skin surrounding it, which gradually pulls it back in. It’s not. I wouldn’t do it if you objected—or if Bruce objected, of course. But I was just thinking about having a baby around and I started getting all squishy.”“Are you still squishy?” Lily asked after she’d kissed me.“Oh, Lily, I wish you could plant a baby inside me.”“Maybe we should go into the guest room so we don’t disturb hubby and let me investigate to make sure all the channels are open and receptive,” she said as she cupped my breast. Oh, God!“I love you. But I think I’d better pick up Emily and go to a museum for a few hours. I’ll see if I can get a ticket for Pinocchio at the Children’s Theater and take her there, too. We need to keep it quiet here or he’ll be right back in the bathroom. And so will you.”“He’s going to suffer for this all day, isn’t he?” Lily said. “That must have brought him close to alcohol poisoning. We should have called an ambulance.”“With any luck, he’ll suffer for it for a long time,” I said. Yes, that was evil, but I wasn’t going to let him forget he’d.
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