.."Yeah, that talk - the most embarrassing moment of any teenagers life.So I knew what it was. I even whispered about that sort of thing with the girls in school, talked about boys and sex and what it would be like. But... I was different... I mean, I sometimes got that feeling when I thought about sex, where my breathing went all heavy and my underwear got that little bit damp. But it wasn't the same as when I was in the pool - when I was all naked and alone, and anyone passing by might catch me. Sometimes I used to imagine what might happen if they decided they wanted to do something a little more than watch... how they'd come over and climb in... and there'd be nothing I could do to stop them...It never went much further than imagining them climb in though. Once or twice I imagined them coming closer, reaching out - but when I started thinking about that, I'd usually get embarrassed and go inside. My mind knew where it wanted to go, but I don't think I was quite ready to let. During the warm summer months we liked to play in the pool while Mom would lay on a blanket and sun bathe. Except for Mom, none of us wore any thing. We were about 5 or 6 then. In the evenings, she would bathe all three of us at the same time.I can remember Mon and Dad discussing something almost every evening and some times getting very loud. I could tell that both Mom and Dad were very upset about something. When were about 10, Mom and Dad divorced and the three of us were separated. I had to go with my Dad and Chris and Sam stayed with Mon. I always wondered why Mom wanted Sam to stay with her. I ask Dad several times but never got an answer.We got to visit about twice a month but always it was for only about 3 to 4 hours each time. This went on for several years.I went on and finished school and later joined the service; I turned 18 a month after joining up. After boot camp, I was given a 7-day pass. Stopped by home and had a 2 day visit with Dad. He had re-married. .
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