I canrecall taking an action figure and stealing Barbie clothes fromneighboring girls to dress him in. Sadly, about the time when I might havereally been able to start sorting me out, I was exposed to a rapist, andspent two years in Hell.Part of what happened to me was he justified his attacks on me because ofmy feminine side. He made me so afraid of my desire to be female that iburied it until I was approaching puberty. Then the sense of wrongness,the horrible feeling that somehow, I was going in the wrong directionbecame overwhelming. But I kept it hidden as best as I could.Then I became a Christian. This made my conflict even stronger, as I wasinducted into a conservative branch of the faith, and felt sure that myneed for the feminine was a sin. This lead to a cycle of "binging" -getting girl clothes and trying to be as female as I could, followed byguilt and "purging" where I would get rid of everything, only to start upagain a week later, or even sooner.Not only that, I suffered. "Silicone breast forms, just like yoursissy-sister" Lisa explains. Tina then slips the nightie over me, shealso removes my red knickers & replaces them with the pink G-string."Let's give Paula a glimpse of what she's getting" & rearranges my semi-erect cock such that it is sticking up, clearly visible through the frontof the g-string. After a quick hair brush, application of pink lipstick &a little perfume, I am given a matching wrap which is left open at thefront & pronounced ready. There is a knock on the bed-room door & Juliaasks "Is Joanne ready yet, Paula is waiting for her in their bed-room."Tina opens the door & answers "Yes', I am ushered out, Julia & Karen areboth in the hallway wearing similarly provocative nightwear & nod theirapproval of my attire & look. Julia opens a door across the hall with asticker saying "Paul's Room" on it & I nervously walk forward & enter.Someone closes the door behind me, as they all say "Goodnight Paula,goodnight Joanne."I look around the room,.
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