She spiritedly defended the smiling cartoon characters sown into a field of blood-red roses, and later he impressed her by carefully folding it up and setting it on her desk before they made love on her narrow single bed. He checked the oxygen level in the tank behind her chair, and as she slept, he updated the notebook containing her medication schedule along with questions for the home hospice nurse who stopped by each afternoon. The notebook seemed to reduce her anxiety, and he relied on it more and more as his fatigue increased with the passage of each day, and the boundaries between yesterday, today, and tomorrow became less and less distinct. He dreaded a lapse in memory, or a missed dose, that might cause her pain or anxiety. When it was time for her morphine, he gently caressed her cheek and called her name softly to awaken her gradually. She smiled weakly and murmured, ‘My hero,’ and the hint of happiness in her sparkling blue eyes transported him back to his first sight of. I was a go-fer, a helper, an assistant to whatever my wife was doing that week. I was not even a leader. I will not try to pull the wool over your eyes or baffle you with BS about what they did. My wife got her degree in Biology late in life, she was 43. She went on to get certified as a teacher and taught science for years. But her favorite was hands on with small groups working with animals and insects. Don’t ask about plants, she killed a cactus garden once. Plastic flowers droop for her. She has a black thumb. But this is not about my wife, it is about Elsie and her life. Elsie had a slight learning disability, she needed to be stimulated to learn. One of the ways she was stimulated was to have an animal near her. Goats are not allowed in schools so she was home schooled. She did well in this manner. Subjects she had trouble with she received extra tutoring. Many times all you had to do was find a way to relate the subject to her goats, and then she did well. Public schools do.
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