He told her the reason was because he knew if he got together with her he would never be able to let her go. He had his life all laid out and a wife would have held him back. He had to fight his desire for her so he could go off and be the big success he wanted to be in the NFL. He told her that he knew that once he had achieved his goal they would find each other because they were meant to be. Wendy told me that she knew it was all bullshit, but somehow they ended up back in bed together."She couldn't explain it to me because she said she couldn't understand it herself. She told me that it wasn't the sex because you were a much better lover than Brandon. In fact she played you up so much that if I wasn't ass end over teakettle in love with Harry I'd have been tempted to take a shot at you myself. What I think happened is that she spent so much time and effort on him in high school that now he was with her she just couldn't walk away from him. His being with her somehow justified all. And then he’d shown her how to get the reactor together, how to run it, and then how to draw its power. And together they’d powered up. Time and again, bumping up the levels each time. Weeks later and that effect goes on. And on. He felt it now. A power that the coal-powered day-to-day life could never generate. Sure the coal-powered version was just fine. Just fine and dandy. That was the problem, it was ‘just’ fine and dandy. And you could draw on it whenever you needed. In fact, you didn’t draw on it. You lived in it, absorbing its power daily. Just enough for each day. Sometimes a spike or two would come about that you could go on with for a while, but mainly it was a daily habit. Hard to break, and one that you wouldn’t want to break. You can live with that power, draw on it and reside in it. Grow up and old on it. It’s good for the soul. It maintains and it preserves. It powers us all and our communities. It’s the accepted power source. It doesn’t fuck you up. Shit, it even.
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