Trust me when I say that its nature’s way of protecting us from ourselves. (And yes, male audience, I’m sure you’re loving this.) Nature is seeking to preserve us, the progenitors of humanity, even at the cost of a chocolate covered depression. In the end, we’re supposed to ended up with something better, safer, and less lethal than our misguided desires. There are a lot of things I wish I had gotten over. I’m taller than I want, curvier than I want. I was naïve. I thought I could rule the world because I’d made the ‘don’t talk to me,’ look a higher art form, and a buttery smooth talker. And a pretty quick runner. I survived complete calamity for 24 years. I survived my college loans. Best day of my life hands down. I got too confident. I think the I-told-you-so types will call it, ‘hubris.’ The universe saw I had tipped the balance, and rectified its mistake by allowing me to stumble into the ultimate boo boo. That’s why I’m currently dressed in a red, diamond encrusted dress, in. The day after I spoke to my gay friend in work Julian and told him that I and Hillary were having a rough patch, I didn’t tell him the full details of catching her masturbate but just we were having problems. His advice was to go home and talk compliment her and to get her a gift, in my mind I thought I’ll just go home and kiss her ass that’s when the light went off in my head. I got home that day finished tidying up and waited for Hillary to come home from her jog, once she did dressed in a tank top and sexy shorts I walked over to her and we began to kiss. “Sorry about all the fighting” I said as my lips pressed against her neck, Hillary put her head back “it’s no one’s fault, this is a surprise you don’t normally get like this when I’m all sweaty” Hillary began to kiss me back and her hands stroked my back and she began to squeeze my bum. “You like it?” I asked her response was a snog as she began to creases my boobs and put her hand down my pants. It felt great, I grabbed her.
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