How could I tell anyone that he was wrong, that it was the dark that did it to me. The noise that my flashlight made when it hit my door brought my mother to my room, and when she hit the switch to see what was going on, the light scared the dark away, and I was saved.Six months of psychological therapy showed me that my parents must really love me. After all, didn't they pay all that money to a therapist who in the end was convinced that I had been cured of my insecurities, which had manifested themselves into my being afraid of the dark?Actually, I felt bad about my parents paying all that money for nothing, and I told my therapist that I could see that he was right; there was nothing about the darkness that was frightening, that it was all in my head and that I was a perfectly normal preadolescent with perfectly normal fears and that the dark couldn't possibly really hurt me ... especially since I got a new flashlight and a small back up one besides!Eventually, as I grew into my. ” She replied, pointing at a page in the book. “But, I don’t know cars.” I rolled to face her.“What sounds fake?”She began to read to me from the book, which turned out to be a compilation of letters from the Penthouse Forum. It had been left at our house in Minnesota by one or the other of our strange friends. The letter told of an experiment utilizing a rubber hose attached to the intake of a car as a masturbation aid.“I’m not sure either.” I said. “We could test it, I guess.”“How?”“Let me go try something.”I got up from the bed, pulled on my spandex shorts and went out to the garage. Unlocking the car, I opened the hood and looked at the intake. From the wide span of it over the fuel injectors it arced around the engine casing, the end of it narrowing to the diameter of the upholstery brush for our Shop-Vac. Pulling the vacuum from under the desk, I removed the hose and upholstery brush, fitting the attachment over the intake opening and attaching the vacuum’s hose. The opposite.
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