The penis wasn’t well-received by Dick, ironically. Barbara growing it conveniently coincided with his decision that they needed to take a break so that he could focus on fighting crime. Weirdly, Barbara doesn’t suspect that he has a problem with the penis. She suspects that he likes it so much that it makes him uncomfortable. Whatever the case, they haven’t spoken in almost six months. Fortunately, getting a doctorate keeps Barbara busy enough that being single isn’t much of a problem. The problem is the looks that she gets from women at the gym because there’s no hiding this thing in leggings.“You almost seem happy to have me here,” Barbara notes as she examines the new costume. “Do you even want Bruce to come back?”Of course he does. Barbara regrets even saying it, but Alfred replies evenly. “I suppose you look better in tights.”Barbara laughs.“Why are you so angry with him?” Alfred asks bluntly.“He started a fight that he couldn’t finish,” Barbara says. “And then takes off? What’s. ”“And you got out.”“I figured two tours in Afghanistan was enough.” And one shattered humvee. Of course, I didn't tell her that. “Well, I can understand that.” I saw a bit of kindness in her eyes, or maybe it was respect. Well, it was something. “So what brought you here?”“An ex-boyfriend. He asked me to meet him here.” And she practically spat the words out, so angry she was. I laughed, and oddly enough a moment later she did too. “It may be I had it coming. We were lovers a couple of years ago, and it ended badly. My fault mostly. I sort of wanted to have a drink and bury the hatchet.”“Where did you want to bury it? You're not dressed for a drink, you're dressed for a night out. Which might end up as a night in.”She turned and give me a long look with a wry grin. “He had his faults, but Eric was always a really good shag.”“Sounds like sex is important to you, and you don't much care about convention.”“Perceptive aren't you, soldier girl?”“Well, English, it kinda comes with the job..
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