She referredme to a therapist. A month ago I would've hated the idea, butnow...anything that might help with the way I'm feeling.DAY 32Had my first appointment with Dr. [Name Redacted]. He said it soundedlike I might have gender dysphoria. I fuckin' walked out. I'm not a [SlurRedacted], I'm a man!DAY 34Felt like shit again. Dr. [Name Redacted] called, and I set up anotherappointment. Maybe he's right. I've been looking online and the symptomsfit.DAY 35Second appointment with Dr. [Name Redacted]. I think he's right. I'vespent so long trying to prove myself, scared of what I think I alwaysknew, deep down. I've been playing a part, trying to be what I think aman is supposed to be, but it's always felt false, I understand that now.I'm ready to start accepting who I really am.DAY 36I bought my first tube of lipstick today. The cosmetics aisle was sobright, and I had to wait until there wasn't anyone around. My heart wasbeating so hard I could hear it. I felt like I was trying to rob a. So i went inside and avoided the front desk were the worker womans were. by the way all the workers there were females, so made it more thrilling. so i went and grab a movie and walked around. being in public with my tight jeans was a beautiful feeling. i wish i was completely dressed up. so i just walked and try to be there more time dressed up. i was actually loving it and getting hard. my cock was getting hard and i could feel my panties getting wet of precum. i wanted to pull my cock and i knew a couple of strocks would made me squirt with so much force my thick juicy cum. but knew i had to wait. so finally looked at the front cashiers and notice no customers so i quickly walked there. but when i was there waiting to get checked out a couple pulled behing me. my heart started pounding furiously. i knew i had to get out of there quickly. i was hoping they didnt notice my jeans. so i dint look back and try to chceck out fast. so i did and finally walked to the car fast. i got in.
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