“Ssshhh! They can hear,” she hisses at me and I look over and both boys are watching us with confused smiles. She’s funny when she’s fucked up, but I’m just as curious as them. Aaliyah goes to a cupboard and pulls out a plastic bag with baked goods inside. She opens it and holds it up to me and smiles. I catch a whiff of the wafting scent from the bag and gasp. Special brownies. “Steven?” I ask, and she nods proudly. Her cousin Steven makes the best cannabutter I’ve ever had. When he gets cooking it’s cloud 9. Aaliyah and I haven’t eaten pot brownies in a while though, and this was a treat. I pull one out of the bag and take a bite and she giggles. “Let’s go share,” she says, and runs back to the living room. Every step I take towards the couch with my mouth full of chocolate, I can feel the Xanex more and more. I get to Eugene and sit right in his lap and hold out a section of brownie. He laughs at me and eats the piece, knowing exactly what it is. We help each other finish what. But I had alreadyslept with my hair in rollers before. I had never before slept, or triedto, while having my own two mounds of gelatinous flesh shiftingprovocatively under me with each move. Eventually I was able tounderstand how my arms and breasts had to reach an agreement as toposition. Then it became cozy and sweet and sensuous to be resting withmy breasts nestled into gently confining silk cups and having thebillowing peignoir wrap my torso in a shimmering confection. Severaltimes before I finally feel asleep, I had to position my skirt to assurethat I felt all the tantalizing sleek smoothness it offered on my hipsand buns. Sleep finally came. Breasts and body had become one andreached an agreement to exist together in happiness to make this youngman feel like a natural woman.I felt like a woman.I felt like a woman who is also a man.In my dreams that night I had the feeling that I would love to be a girlbut I felt that I had to maintain some semblance of my masculinity. Ineeded.
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