And I need to be sure that you’re not stuck in … in some kind of a negative loop.”“You taking advantage of me?” she said in a surprised tone of voice. She rubbed her eyes and swept her hair back, as though to let air cool her head. “I … I have needed something. Something that could make me feel good. Being a single mom is hard. Being a single woman is hard. I always feel like I should put you first in every situation and myself last. But … at the same time, I feel like I haven’t actually changed as a person. Even though I don’t sleep around with men, doesn’t mean that those urges have vanished somewhere.”“You know I wouldn’t stop you if you wanted to be with someone.” I said, just adding to the conversation.“I know. That’s why I make that choice myself.” she nodded. “I don’t know. Maybe I’m really stupid. But what happened yesterday was in no way your fault. I just needed it so goddamn bad that I couldn’t put my foot down.”“You know.” I said, sitting down next to her on the bed.. It was time to get clever. Old photos were recognized by some of the restaurantworkers. The Davieses were still in town. The local gymrecognized Jon too. That was good, as that was a prime place tobump into him. Sarah joined. She also discovered that heregularly worked out straight after work. The next day shespotted him coming to the gym while she was sipping a coffee ina caf? across the road. She walked down the street he had comeup. When he eventually came back down she followed him, right tohis apartment block. She called the building supervisor andasked for him by name, so the super told her which number helived in. Within two more days she knew the car he drove, where heworked, what Linda spent her time doing, and that he had achild. Momentarily that put her off. Jon was a father. Then shereconsidered. That child should have been hers. As she thoughtof the implications she realized that her plan fell a littleshort now. Making Jon impotent was a little late now that he.
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