I had an idea that I thought would make a good story, but knew I didn't have the skills to write commercially so typed it out on my computer intending family only distribution.I shared it with my eldest son; he suggested I post it on an online site. The story could be read for others for free and I might get some feedback. Though he did suggest I convert to Times New Roman font. I thanked him for his suggestions and made the font change. I didn't even mind the implied criticism.I posted the story, it was a little out of place because the site specializes in erotica, but they allowed about anything legal to be posted.It was up for less than eight hours and I started getting emails. Most were complimentary but several with some sincere criticism. I went back and did a thorough spell and punctuation check, and fixed some run on sentences, also paragraphs were too long. One person pointed out that I was being unrealistic on how long I was having my character hit a golf ball, the story. Wouldn't it be wonderful?" No ... please...", said Lillian meekly, her mind filled with a turmoil of emotions and desires that kept her distressed and confused."Ryan, please call a friend. You already heard her, it is an old time fantasy of hers. Just be sure that your pal is 18 or older, I don't want any troubles."Ryan pulled out his cell phone, and then he couldn't believe his bad luck."Fuck! My cell battery died. Shit!" Then run, go for your pal, and we wait for you".Ryan darted outside the main door a lot faster than could be expected given his considerable overweight.Lillian and Karen were left alone once again. Karen stood up in between Lillian's legs. Karen's foot was almost touching Lillian's pussy. Lillian looked to the side. Trying to avoid eye contact or even seeing Karen. She was extremely embarrassed.Karen said softly, "Lilly. Look at me", she had to insist several times until Lillian's eyes finally started traveling all the way up. She looked at Karen, her sight.
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