It turns out that they are fully aware that I am a ‘shemale’ (Dave’s word), but they were too polite to mention it. They also think I might be what Ronson wants in order to get him to leave off about the castle.Ever conscious of contractual obligations, deadlines and the like, the following is agreed: Dave will take a photo of me and send it to Ronson. On my arrival at Ronson’s lair, he will send a text to Dave confirming that he will not require any more money. In return, Dave will text back formally apologizing for ripping Ronson off in the first place (incredibly, this solution had not occurred to Dave).There is a bit of photography, and I try not to look either too self-conscious or too slutty. We agree that the best photo is from slightly above, with me looking big-eyed but strict. My gaze is intense anyway, which helps.Throughout, I feel a strange euphoria. I’ve got a tendency to be sacrificial. It’s part of my submissive nature, and a hangover from the past, when I saw such. Despite all that had happened, she was lucky. Lucky to have an uncle who wasn’t shooting dope, wasn’t in jail, wasn’t dead. An uncle who cared enough to take her in. Doreen was thankful she’d turned eighteen last month. She knew if she were still a minor and had no one to take her in, she could have ended up like her friend Lorna, whose mom was arrested last year for illegal possession of a controlled substance and solicitation of a cop. One day Lorna was at school, and the next day she wasn‘t. Word spread fast about what happened to her mom, but Lorna fell through the cracks, shuffled around various foster homes. A few months ago, Doreen got a call from her. ‘This is fucking horrible, Doreen,’ Lorna said, raising her voice to be heard over shouting in the background. It sounded like she was in a room with a dozen small children. ‘I hate my mom, but I’d go back to live with her in a second. I’d take the pill heads and pimps over this. Whatever happens, don’t let them take you away.
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