My mind shifted to an image that was the polar opposite of what was going on. I remembered watching a documentary about anacondas and I remembered seeing one slowly draw a deer’s body slowly into its stretched mouth and down its gullet. Another moan from my wife brought me back to reality and my view was partly obscured by BigDick’s thigh. But when he’d withdraw some, it seemed like she was taking about half of his prodigious length and her opening appeared stretched to a diameter I’d seen only when she was dilating for the birth of our son.Reading the room momentarily, I saw that BIL had moved and was now sitting with BigDick’s wife and they were alternately kissing, groping, and watching the assignation on the couch. I thought about moving to where BIL’s wife was but the better couch view was where I was and so I invited her over with a wave. My heart leaped when she got up and came my way. Silently, she sat close beside me, our bodies touching, and she took my hand. Between the. It may well have been there, but his thespian skills were much more subtle. Or perhaps he was more genuine. He was truly appealing. Why hadn’t I noticed before? I probably had. But this time, I was different. All my relationships before Jeff had been based on what they could do for me. They might get something they wanted, but there was no real reciprocation. My concept of a relationship had not included mutuality. Now that it did, I was able to look at a man differently, even though nothing about him had changed. Etienne was charming and I could see that with all his qualities, he could be someone it would be possible and even reasonable to care about. That was it, that was what had been missing. When the entire focus of a relationship is what he can do for me, it isn’t possible to develop feelings for someone who is, essentially, a tool. Adding the concepts of what can I do for him and can I care for him, it’s not clear you can have one without the other. Nonetheless, Etienne was.
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