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I'll make up my own mind about my life, thank you. So, you can stop linking your arm in mine until I tell you that I want it there, if I ever do. OK?"Eventually, as the silence became pervasive, she looked up at me. I looked down on her.She spoke first, "I'm sorry. I know I have no right. I gave that up, and I was so wrong to do that. And I'm so sorry that I did..."My anger subsided and I sat down again, but leaving us far enough apart to be clear that this wasn't kiss and make-up."I'm sorry, too. I don't mean to shout at you. And, to be honest, it isn't that you put your arm in mine. It really isn't. It's just that everyone seems to know what to do for the best about my life, except for me. I really would like to come to my own conclusions."Again there was a long pause, then very quietly she asked, "Do I stand any chance?" I don't know. For everything I seem to think of, there seems to be an equal and opposite reason why not. If only I could know in my heart what I wanted to do,. I am utterly his now. I feel only anticipation, thinking not even the simplest of thoughts and wait for him. I am gagged and only know that I will be whipped severely. He does like to hear me whimper and scream but would rather let my body tell him how much he has hurt me. I have very fair skin that marks and bruises easily so he has learned to know my limits by my twitches, struggles and the occasional muffled wail. I prefer to be gagged also. I do not have to concentrate on limiting the noise I make and I prefer to bite down on something rather than clench my teeth until they hurt. I merely bite down on the gag and only when I am in the deepest grips of pain are any cries wrenched from me. My minds is drifting now, I await his next move. There is a know at the door. He pulls a blanket over me. It is the housekeeper, a sour old woman. I hear her whining and then hear him telling her I will be available at 3 to meet with her. He closes the door behind him. My body has cooled in anger.
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