And then I proceeded to give Superb-Man a bitch slapping. Once he was unconscious, I pulled out a copy of Nietzsche’s ‘Thus Spake Zarathustra’, a book so heavy I could barely hold it. It only took a few well aimed blows to make sure Superb-Man would be in a wheel-chair for life. It wouldn’t do to kill a fellow commie. Now there was nobody to stop me from punishing the corporate board of Moneymaker Films for the countless hours of corny-action-torture I’d endured in movie theaters across the world. I simply walked into the thousand story building that was Moneymaker Films’ headquarters. I took an elevator the thousandth floor. I was about to walk into the board room and dispatch the board when somebody hit me over the head. I turned around only to take several vicious blows from an electric guitar. My attacker was a short, thin man with long, oily blonde hair and a beautiful face. Once I was on the ground, he smashed the guitar to pieces on my helpless body. Once he was done, he took. “Behave yourself,” he replied, not knowing if she would understand. He brandished his staff, a gesture that needed no translation, her eyes tracking it warily. “I knocked you out once, and I can do it again.”Now that she was incapacitated, he didn’t really know what to do with her. He wanted to interrogate her, to ask her what she was doing and why her people were so intent on killing him, but they spoke no common language. Was there a spell for this? She watched him, craning her serpent-like neck as he retrieved his book, starting to search through its index. Lead Tongue, prevent a person from speaking. No, that wasn’t it. Commune with Fey? He had no idea what that meant. Throw Voice, he had used that once already. Amplify Voice, nope. There, a promising entry. Comprehend Tongues, a spell that would allow its caster to understand another’s speech for its duration.She struggled more ardently as he began to recite the incantation, perhaps assuming that he was about to roast her alive.
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