I am concerned about how things are going to be in the future. I have considered getting a Master’s and PhD from The Kennedy School and teaching international relations. This would be permitted, I think. I mean by both your government and mine.”“Would you be happy doing that?”“I do not know at this point. I am considering it. But it is also the case that such an education would be valuable in the Soviet Union. So it is no loss in that regard.”“When would you decide?”“Next summer, I think. I have discussed this with Father and he is supportive. I am sure that he wants you for a son-in-law.”He wasn’t the first one, by any means. That had been Frank Spencer, though I didn’t know it at the time. Later on, it was Ben van Hoek and Robert Block. And after that, Lars Andersson. As I’d told my mom over and over, she was the only adult that didn’t have a high opinion of me. I quickly pushed those thoughts aside, because I didn’t want my mind to wander.“I’m sure. And you would want me for a. And of course, Ifelt top-heavy and sensitive, despite the fact that Colleen wasn'tincredibly endowed. And it felt odd not to have sensation where my penisused to be. The feeling of a long, loose cloth swishing against bare legs.The light feathery touch of hair on shoulders and back. The sense oflightness... I was a heavy guy. Colleen was a _slim_ girl. And just thedifferent way the _world_ looked when looked at from only a few incheslower. And all the colors were just... slightly... different than I wasused to. Very slight differences in hue. Of course, at that point, I wasn't consciously itemizing any of this...my hindbrain was basically just screaming, "I've got different sensoryinput coming in on all my channels and what the _hell_ is going on here?"It resulted in me reeling a little bit. My will stepped in and had me look her... him... *me*... straight inthe eye and say, "Coll, I have no fucking idea what's going on here, andif I stop and thinking about it, I basically know I'm.
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