With a triumphant ‘Whoop’, Sean threw his cards down, his straight beating my low pair, and gathered to pot toward him, my IOUs mixing in with the loose mountain of bills. I unsteadily rose to my feet, wondering how long I would have to pay back the vouchers, and contemplating where I would get the money from. I had chosen to forgo work while at university to better focus on my studies, so I was dependent largely on some savings I had had prior, and from a small monthly stipend from my parents. I knew neither would be enough to cover the debt I owed.With unsteady feet and alcohol hazed vision, I made my way around the table to where Sean was gathering up his winnings, to try to work out an arrangement for paying off my debt.“So, Sean,” I began. “I don’t have the money right now to pay you back with, but I’ll get it to you as soon as I can.”Sean waved me off, as he continued to organize and count his winnings. I stood there, swaying a little, perplexed as to what to do. I always paid. “There’s no subjectivity. I can’t paint my expression in them. Not when I have to mimic the real world. I don’t get to pour any of my truths into them. Instead, I have to paint other’s truths. Reality’s boring truths. I miss it so much. It was nice dancing before the faerie, and I do get to create such wondrous art while making love to my brother and his women, but ... but ... I truly find joy in painting. It’s been over a year since I held a brush, Ealaín.“A year!”“Yes, it’s hard to pursue your passion when you’re following your brother around on his adventure.”“It won’t be forever,” I said, my frustration dying down. “We’re getting closer to being done.”“Will it be over, though?” Her citrine eyes bored into me. “Won’t there always be another adventure for Sven to throw himself into? Another dangerous task? Another perilous quest?”I blinked and looked ahead at my brother. The exhaustion settled on my thoughts again as her words stirred through my brain. My brother did enjoy.
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