" Not as much as me I think." Why do you say that?" You're not exactly the same as when she dropped you off." She didn't drop me off, I rode the bus." Good point. Have you ever tried being Charlotte before this summer?Does your mom know anything?" Honestly?" Please..." I tried on a pair of her shoes once, and coat, it was pink. A fewyears ago, just to see... I'm not sure if I put them back quite right.She was looking at me funny for a week." That's so strange isn't it? When she was a little girl, your mom,Olivia, used to be quite the tomboy. I remember our mother trying toget her to try on dresses, but Olivia wouldn't have anything of it." You think she wouldn't like me doing it?" I think she might have gone through something similar, and she doesn'tknow how to deal with it. But honestly, I haven't seen your mom in awhile. I don't know her so well anymore. She's always wrapped up inwork. I think she feels like if she takes a break, the world will end.That's kind of funny when I think. . . a companion.’ I started pacing back and forth. ‘You know everything about me. We’re comfortable with each other like a pair of old shoes.’ I sighed. ‘I need more. I need it all. I need to be swept off my feet! I need to be romanced and I’ve never had that! I want to be desired and fawned over . . I want to be told I’m beautiful.’ I stopped pacing and tried not to cry. ‘I want to be loved so badly it hurts. It hurts a lot. But I can’t let myself believe that just because you’re having some kind of mid- life crisis or worse. . . feeling lonely, suddenly you love me.’ I was starting to get angry now. ‘I’m just supposed to fall into your arms in gratitude because you finally feel something and take pity on the fat girl!’ ‘Stop it!’ It was his turn to be angry. ‘I don’t feel sorry or pity. And I don’t expect you to just fall into my arms.’ He came up to me to look me in the eyes. ‘I’ve been an idiot.’ He raised my chin to make me look into his eyes. ‘I have always loved you.’ ****** I.
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