It had also induced a deep sense of shame into my sexuality.Much later in married life, I discovered that only a guilt-ridden fantasy of Dan allowed me to climax fully.For me sex was a cocktail which included a shot of Dan and a shot of Shame.But since my husbands death, all that had been forgotten: until Dan had came to stay with us.While I stare into the darkness of the window I become aware of the reflection that’ s before me; of the two of them on the floor behind me. I smile at the quirk of it, like watching a hidden camera. Jez is squirming on the floor underneath Dan.Kneeling over her, he’s tickling her first on the neck then the waist. She’s in convulsions, legs kicking out against the delightful torture, her white thighs flashing, her school dress skewed up past her knickers.The tickling fingers work from her waist down into her thighs and suddenly I’m transfixed; my heartbeat is the only sound I’m aware of.I watch his finger stroking slowly over her thighs and into the. They were still talking about it an hour later when a police detective came to our front door.That's when I learned Marsha went home from my house Saturday, still trying to decide between suicide and running away. But this morning she finally couldn't take it any longer. She broke down and told her parents everything. She spent most of the day at the police station. They brought in dozens of detectives and took statements. Then they started rounding people up.She tried to leave me out of it. But of course that wasn't possible. A lot of people lied about their involvement at first. But Reggie provided such a clear and constant video record of nearly every rape which took place that there was enough evidence to convict nearly half the boys in our school of rape.They stood this little town on end. Mr. Curry and Mr. Perez were arrested. Marshal's operation got raided. I finally found out that the building we went to so that Reggie could sell him our DVDs was a strip club. It came out.
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