"That is not what I mean," she replied "it's just that everything you do with your parents is always leading them to think that you need them and that makes them be over protective with you, you are a pampered child my dear, more a ten year old girl than sixteen."I felt tears coming, and was with watery eyes when Gill saw me."Oh, sorry Bobbie I didn't want to be mean with you, sorry, sorry!"Seeing her distress I calmed a bit fixed my make up and leave to the table, but the damage was already done and I was feeling more and more disgusted.At the movies Joel sat with me far away form Gill and his friend Richard, then Joel asked me:"What happened in the bathroom there?" Why?" I said."Because that you seemed to bright with your own light and after you went to the bathroom, you looked more distressed, was because something that Gill told you, right?" No don't worry Joel", I replied, "let's see the movie."Joel didn't say anything else to me, he just commented on the movie from time to. Harmony visited me every day while I was in the hospital. I had to wear a device to support my neck—a cervical collar, it was called—for several weeks after departing the hospital, and once again I was sleeping in the dispensary.I wasn't alone. I could hear coughing. The neck brace kept me from moving my head. I was also strapped to my bed. And I was still woozy from sedatives. There were other boys in the dispensary, but I didn't know how many or who they were. Unfortunately I didn't care, either. Could have been depression. Might have been drugs. I was oblivious to my surroundings most of the time.Harmony visited me every day—the high point of my dispensary stay."Hey, boyfriend," Harmony said as she held my hand and stroked my face."Hey, girlfriend," I parroted. "Thanks for visiting me."Harmony talked. Often she'd ask a question and I didn't have an answer. Yes, I was still pretty much a blank page. I guess that was my primary attraction as the boyfriend of an exclusively homosexual.
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