She’d been the root of too many of them and ducked responsibility for all of them.“Jesus, Rand!” she breathed. “I had no idea you’d withdrawn that much!”“How could you? The neighbors were all hands-off, and you and I haven’t talked since September. You were probably right. You were the only person I talked to. When you cut me off, I had no one to talk to. Jack Daniels is a great listener, but doesn’t give much advice, you know?”“You started drinking?” she seemed really upset by that.“Not as much as I wanted to,” I told her. “I started going to the gym pretty quickly instead. The point is that I’d probably have stayed content to have you be the only person I talked to for a while. When you cut me off, it forced me to look for something else. My group is helping me cope. They’re all people that have been where I am. It still hurts some of them. Others are paying it forward by mentoring the group.”“I’m glad you found people who understand,” she said gently. “Are you close to any of them. Just forget me. You’ll be better off. You’ve got to believe me.’ Hildy began crying in earnest and Jim leaned back against the driver’s side door. He didn’t know what she meant, so he tried a guess because he had to try something. ‘Is it because you’ve never been to college? It doesn’t matter…’ Hildy was still crying and was holding her face in her hands but she was shaking her head. Jim was determined to try again. He thought it might be because she was tall, or a bit plain, but those things seemed so trivial. He tried the last thing he could think of. ‘Your father is behind this, somehow, isn’t he?’ Hildy picked her headup. Her whole face was drenched, with tears or sweat—Jim could not tell. She reached over and grabbed him by the shirt collar with both hands. He eyes were propped open as wide as they could be and Jim couldn’t tell if he saw rage or fear. ‘I’ve lied to you all along. I deceived you. I’m damaged. You think I’m someone that I’m not,’ she cried at him. She released.
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