Darrell ate everything on his plate and looked down at Karen. He told her that there was nothing left for her so she would have to eat slave gruel. He got up and grabbed a bag of what looked like dog food except this one said slave gruel for pregnant slaves. He poured the bowl full and then poured water on it and filled the other bowl with water. He ordered Karen to eat it all in the next 10 minutes or he would make her clean the outhouse with her tongue. Karen didn’t want to do that so she immediately set about eating the gruel and drinking the water as fast as she could. It really didn’t have any taste to it. It was like eating saw dust. When she was a little less than half done she heard Darrell say “Five minutes left E She redoubled her efforts and started swallowing everything with minimal chewing. She just got the last mouthful in her mouth when she heard Darrell say time. She quickly swallowed the last bite as Darrell came over and looked at the empty bowls. . I hid my face with my hair so no-one would see me so upset. Finally, to my relief, the class was over and I picked up my bag and ran from the room, desperate to get home so I could grieve privately.At home, I was relieved that Jermaine was out. We’d moved into a realm where we cried privately and went about doing our own thing. We didn’t cry in front of each other: somehow sharing our tears would have made the whole nightmare even more unbearable.Having undressed, I put on my bathrobe before flopping onto my bed where I sobbed into the pillow until there were no more tears left. It felt like sand had replaced moisture in my ducts. Grief is exhausting, and crying always made me tired as well as providing the mother of all headaches.I fell asleep at some point, sheer exhaustion overtaking me. My mind shut off, like a window blind being pulled down to block out the dark of the night. Self-preservation, I suppose.Anyway, I awoke to Jermaine’s knock on my door. ‘Are you ready for something.
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