“I forgot about those.” The least I could do was be honest. “I really shouldn’t have left them there. I can’t tell you how sorry I am.”Lots of horrible thoughts ran around my head, the worst of which was that she might be able to have me fired. When I thought about that later it seemed hardly likely, but at the time I had no good outcome present itself to me.“It’s okay.” Nancy sounded less than certain. “I’ll talk to you about it later, okay?”I acknowledged her comment and hung up, thinking it was far from “okay”. It was slightly mystifying that she said we’d talk about it later and I had a fleeting vision of being blackmailed. I shook that from my head—surely Nancy wouldn’t be like that?Later turned out to be late that afternoon, when we were both at the soda vending machine.“Look, I’m really sorry about that.” I fought through my pounding heart to try and make it better. “I’ll come around tonight and delete all the files for you. I really. And she was sitting next to a boy at that moment. Shewas older than the boy, supposedly more experienced than him, andsupposedly the dominant one in their budding relationship. But thebutterflies in her stomach belied all of that. She was just an innocentyoung schoolgirl, wearing schoolgirl shiny pink lip gloss, hoping tohave her first sexual experience with a boy. "Charlie," she whispers,"I'm sorry. I would never embarrass you. I just want to be with you.It was a way for me to be with you, to have you close to me."The boy, like her, has pink toenails. At her urging, he painted both oftheir nails matching pinks yesterday. The boy has done a lot of thingsat her suggestion: trying on dresses at the mall, letting her do hismakeup, wearing a bikini. Young Charlie always looked so cute in hisembarrassment."Charlie, I find you attractive when you do those things with me.There's nothing wrong with that, is there? There's certainly nothingwrong with a boy who is as pretty as you..
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