It had been a week since he was buried.Roger and Sue,You are reading this and it means that I am no longer in this world. You must be wondering why I wrote this letter even after dismissing all of you that Saturday. You must have some idea why I did what I did that Saturday. I was dying and I did not want to go from this world longing for another minute, another hour with my children and grand children. I did not want to see the pain of losing me in your eyes every day. I had asked for all of you to be informed of my death immediately so that you could see me for the last time and forgive me for turning you away.I always wanted to make myself believe that I was a senile bitter man but I knew in my heart I was a broken man who was waiting for his death ever since the day he lost his children. Trust me when I tell you that I would have accepted all of you, even Darin, had you come to me before I found out about my terminal illness. Now that you will inherit my estate you will realize. I found it warm, but in a different way than the rest of the apartment. The heat just seemed kind of surface heat, it didn't really penetrate. I don't know how else to explain it. I was still cold deep inside, but my skin was warmer somehow. Probably my imagination.I ran about eight inches of water into the tub, then I put the little plastic step stool into the tub then climbed in. With a kitchen sponge I washed my body with a new bar of soap. That one bar of soap was doing double duty as a coffee cup sanitizer until I got my stuff from the camper. I was going to the compound over two hundred miles away that very day come hell or high water.I dressed in clean underwear and a blue striped tee shirt from the Russian commandos. I had recently acquired several of them off ebay. Since I didn't get a letter of authenticity, I figured they were Chinese knock offs. I was wearing them, not collecting them so I didn't care. They looked great with my skinny jeans.It was still chilly in the.
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