Writing this letter was good for myself. Itlet me open my heart not to others, but to myself. I did not kill myself. I did not commit suicide. Why?Because Suicide is a sin. God gives us life. He gives us a chance onearth to learn who we are. He is not a God that will throw us in hellbecause we feel that we are confused. He is a God of love and compassion.He could have made me a sissy. I could even be a girl in a boy's body. Icould even be gay. But after I wrote this letter, I thought there arechildren that are being sexually abused. There are children that do nothave hands or feet. There are children that cannot talk or even think.My problem looks very small compared to these people. This is a proof ofthat God loves me. I never told my parents. I never had shown them this letter. Part of methinks that it will hurt them. I would love for them to treat me as agirl. But I cannot get everything I wish in life. I have a sister. Louisa that considers me her sister. This is the ray oflight. And most of that weight was from muscle built from working out. Jamie had short light brown hair and almond shaped eyes that were the most strange shade of gray/green. The first few minutes of the drive were normal they were just chit-chatting about unimportant details. Then Jamie started asking Christie if she had a boyfriend and she responded with a withering but truthful no. Jamie noticed her vulnerability and jumped at his chance. He told Christie how gorgeous and smart she was and she didn't need any high school boys to distract her. Then he put his hand on her bare thigh ever so gently (she was wearing shorts) and that's when Christie got so nervous she had to pull to side of the desolate country road. Jamie lounged to kiss her and that's when she pushed him away asking what he was doing. Jamie responded with I'm giving you a chance at a real man. That's when pure panic set in and Christie tried to leave, but Jamie grabbed her by her waist and roughly tossed her in the back.
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