..” said Kate, miming a face mask.“It wasn’t a full burka, just a headscarf! Looked very presentable. And anyway, we don’t butcher all that many pigs at Keller & Fox. I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t have been an issue.”Kate shrugged.“Well, she’s gone now. Speaking of Muslims ... That building at the end of Chatsworth Road. The one next to St. Augustine’s Priory? They’re going to tear that down.”“Good thing, too. Bloody eyesore,” I said.Some hideous brick carbuncle stood prominently at one end of an intersection, a part of an extension to the priory that had never been completed. The priory was a Catholic school for girls nowadays. Kate called it the Virgin Megastore, but I’m pretty sure she stole that joke.“They’re going to build a mosque. I just read in the local paper planning permission was granted,” said Kate.“Oh great, that’s all we need,” sighed Mel. Kelly gave a disapproving grunt as well.“Yes, I’m sure our lives will be greatly affected by a mosque 500 feet from our house,” I. Then it was all over!"You see," she said with tears now flowing down her cheeks, "until yesterday afternoon, morally I was a piece of filth! Moreover, Jack certainly knew that I was. He had never even asked me out, and I ascribed that to his judgment and good taste. Frankly, when he announced on the air that I was his new co-anchor, I was stunned. You see, I was hearing it for the first time, too. As his co-anchor I'll be sitting beside him at the news desk and I didn't think he could bear ever to be that close to me."But back to my feature: the reason I said I was going to be a spinster was a Catch 22. I had made a decision to reform myself. That meant dumping all of the filth with whom I had been spending my time. But it did something else, too. It reduced the number of my adult friends to only three — and Jack certainly wasn't one of them."Moreover, you see, I had fallen madly in love with Jack Johnson the first instant I laid eyes on him years ago. So thus the catch: I could no.
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