I dated a couple, but never longer than four months and never exclusively. I also made sure they were never connected to my work place in any way. I would not risk my job over some faceless guy whom I was only interested in to distract my mind from my loss. I had begun to find the meaningless sex and empty pleasure less and less satisfying. I was longing for the days and nights I had spent with John. My work got more of my attention, men less of it. After 3 more months I was effectively celibate. My bed felt empty and I was lonely, but having anyone in it with me made my skin crawl. More and more I was wishing John were there. I wanted to settle down and be a wife…his wife. I would have done and given anything to have him back, but he was gone. He wasn’t even in Vancouver any more. I was lost, not knowing what to do until an opportunity came around. I am a businesswoman. When I see an opportunity I grab it by the neck and make it mine! My company, like every other large for-profit. Finally, after letting her waver for a couple minutes, he definitively told her he was going to take her to meet the others and to consult with some Army doctors, at which point she almost seemed relieved that his order had solved her conflicting choices.She lived twenty minutes away by car, in the opposite direction from where Tommy was living, but hadn’t been home in over a week. Tommy ordered her to get some rest that night, even if it meant leaving the hospital unattended. He also told her to meet him back here, at the hospital, tomorrow.Then he shook her hand before saying goodbye. He was surprised when she drew him into a hug and cried for a minute. It wasn’t sexual, as far as Tommy could tell. It was just an emotional release.“It’s okay,” he told her as she held onto him. “You’re not alone. You’re not alone.”When she finally released him, he went over a few what-ifs. “The next group meeting is at noon in two days at the Brown Derby, the famous one on Wilshire Boulevard. If you.
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