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”“Same here. When I was first on my own after losing the legs, I was cooking one day and realized that I had gotten something disgusting on my hands. I spent the next hour in the toilet being sick at the thought of eating that food. Since then, this kitchen is the cleanest room in the house.”Tim wasn’t going to explain what he had found on his hands out of consideration for the guest. The way he often explained it was that moving the wheelchair was like wiping your hand on the bottom of your shoe. Most people found the idea of touching the soles of their shoes after every step a disgusting image when it came to preparing a meal.Tim had touched upon something that was important to Cook without realizing it. Cook relaxed a little as he watched the man work in the oven. It pleased him to see the care the guy took with the food. When Tim rolled over to the refrigerator to get food, he examined every item with the same due diligence that Cook put into it. The large black man smiled as he. She was still in the kitchen cleaning the dishes from dinner. She seemed to move so slowly. I walked out the door without even saying goodbye.Basically just going through the motions as if in a trance, I got into my car. As I drove off, my emotions ran the whole spectrum from anger to hurt. I didn't know whether to cry or scream as I drove away. I believe I did both. I felt like cursing God. I cried out loud, "God, why her? Why not take me?" I was like a raving lunatic with tears in his eyes. Nancy meant more to me than you'll ever know.I thought about all that Nancy and I had been through since we had met. When I first met Nancy, I had already been through one failed marriage. I went through a rather debilitating depression following my "failure" and my "solution" was to drown my sorrows in alcohol. In spite of it all, somehow Nancy saw something in me that nobody else saw. A real human being that was hurting and didn't know how to handle it. She showed me love and helped me out of.
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