By now I could feel my heart thumping in my throat. I put the phone down on the table. A tiny ticking metal heart. I left it there. Closed my eyes, and tried to calm down.A few minutes later Justin returned with a tin of pancake batter, and wasted no time in taking to our kitchen, ushering me there eagerly, where we both cooked and worked like we know each other forever, and in half an hour or less, we were back outside under the barbeque dining shelter, enjoying steamy hot pancakes, butter and syrup. It was a rush, I hardly had time to think, but I have to admit it was fun, i was starving, and now we just relaxed, absorbed in our boytalk, lost in each others' worlds.As our voices died down, there was a pause. Then justin got up, and turned toward me. Abrupt. Almost weird. He looked nearly frustrated, confused, hesitant, but there was also a look of yearning. Then he slowly slid his right hand thru the hair just above falling onto my forehead, and tugged at it slightly. I could sense. Then he hardened his heart and shook her awake.“Time to wake up,” he told her. “I have to get you back.”“What time is it?”“Nearly one. You’ve been asleep for hours.” He paused to let that sink in. Had he paused too long? She looked like she was dropping off again. “I’ve put your clothes at the foot of the bed. Are you going to go back to sleep?”“I’m awake.”Delighted as he would be to watch her dress, it would be certain to discomfit her. He left her there. Minutes later, she came out half-dressed and looking anxious. He pointed towards the bathroom. When she came out of the bedroom a second time, he handed her her coat and put his on. He grabbed the pizza box from the refrigerator and led her downstairs.“Wait in here,” he told her before going to the car. He drove around the block and stopped for her. “I’d have offered you a shower,” he said when she was inside the car, “but I was afraid you’d catch your cold back in this weather.”He couldn’t decide whether to apologize or let her go.
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