Mostly, the strongest emotion as thatflight continued, there was my fear. Fear at what I would discover atthe other end. Fears that eventually, though over a long time, hadproven well founded. Jan had tried, but she couldn't cope, and that hadled gradually to the end of us.Yet what would happen when I managed to remove the millstone that hungaround my neck? What would happen when I didn't have to worry aboutLucy anymore, when her threats and desires to control me were all in thepast? Could I return to an acceptable job, living a nine-to-five life,with time for my children and my soon-to-be-ex wife? Regardless of whatJan and I had together in any future relationship, there had to be arelationship for the sake of our children. I was their father, andRichard's step-father, and the circumstances didn't change that. Thecircumstances simply changed our relationships. If I were given thequality time that I would have to spend, those relationships could begood again.I just had to. He was in a room with women who had turned into pigs.I have to get away, he thought. Have to get out of this room. He was weak, so weak, but he thought if he could just get to his feet maybe he could make a run for it before they saw him. They were busy fighting over some crumbs, squealing in rage and bumping heads, and at the moment their massive hindquarters were turned toward him. The door was just 40 feet away, and if he could get to it he could lock it from the outside, then get away.He got up on his hands and knees, then grabbed on to a handle on the side of the oven to lift himself up. They hadn't heard him, so he was safe. He took one step toward the door, but then the room started spinning. He was too weak to walk, and he reached out wildly for something to hold onto, but in doing so he knocked some mixing bowls off a shelf and they clattered to the floor.They turned their heads at the sound, and Arnie froze.The door was only a dozen or so steps away. Maybe he could make it,.
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