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The pace, stress, and never ending worries were brutally exhausting and held back my recovery. I realized it was true when I felt myself renewed and energized by sleeping as late as I wished, eating whatever and whenever I chose, and having nothing to do but tell the workmen what I wanted done.Often at night I spoke to Catherine in my head, telling her about the changes I was making to her home, and how grateful I was that she brought me here to hide out, even though it didn't work out very well. Owning and personalizing the place gave me a sense of belonging somewhere again. That helped my frame of mind, just as the gentle pace, and easy going days helped my body.My scars were terrible.Every night I looked at my chest and stomach and was once again, amazed to be alive. I was literally, torn to pieces by those shooters, yet survived, and healed up. Clearly the Universe had a job just for me, and it wasn't done.To that end, I put my bank and trust accounts, the farm, Fornier's. Later, I didn't even tell him that Lostraco did the killing. He already knew it and I would feel bad in this situation to confirm what had happened. Some of it might be my own guilt over Tessier's death but that did not bother me very much.The video conferencing was set up with Nicolas providing additional security. We used skype for this so the call could be routed through the skype servers we wanted to use.I stayed out of the view of the camera but my voice went through. I talked to the psychiatrist as an equal and much of the conversation would bypass Jack. Laverne answered every question she could but many memories were buried deep in her mind.The doctor came to his conclusions quickly and spent more of his time talking to me. He wanted to help Laverne directly. I had to explain how this could only happen through the computer or through a clandestine meeting so the doctor could not see us or be followed. In any case, it would take time for this to happen and we did not want to.
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