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I knew it wasn’t true. You would have only made my life better. In the short time I did know you, you completely changed me. I could only imagine who I would have become had we been able to live the life we deserved. My grandma always said, ‘God gives us just enough — never too much and never too little.’ She was right. That short time I knew you was just long enough for me to know someone loved me. I think that was the thing that changed me most of all. Knowing that someone had unconditional love for me. And that was what made me finally able to let go and love myself. Sometimes at night I think about the night you died. I cry every time I remember the look on the nurses face, when I knew the end was near. She came in and pulled away the tubes. Then the doctor came, and they turned off your life support. I closed my eyes as I heard the rhythmic sound of your heart monitor shift to a single sharp note. I still hear that in my head sometimes when I close my eyes. I don’t think it’ll. Ron said, “Based on the weather forecast it looks a little iffy for tomorrow if the forecast is right. I will call you in the morning as I will know more by then.”What Ron said to Ted he relayed to Joni. Walking up to Joni he asked in a somewhat serious tone of voice, “That red thing your almost wore last week, did you bring it this week?Joni knew he was referring to the red baby doll she had put on said with a big smile on her face, “No, this time I brought a green one.”Putting an arm around her waist and bending to put his arm behind her thighs he picked her up and started carrying her to the bedroom saying, “Well you aren’t going to be wearing that one either.”Joni with her arms resting on his shoulders was either laughing or giggling at him in doing this.Making love with Joni was all he hoped it would be. It seemed to him that she too wanted this to happen and encouraged him as well as complimented him as they made love. He gave her oral sex before they made love the first time.
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