You Love The Position, And The Feeling Of It...

You accepted a job position and have no idea what your qualifications are or what your duties require. You analyze and rationalize to justify turning this job offer down. It has too many unknowns, maybe you can find something else this week if you look even harder than you had these past six months. You start to analyze the source of the job offer. You have not kept in particularly great touch with your sister since you both became adults. If you turn down the job, it wouldn’t reflect badly on her, right? Maybe this was a pity job hire, or more elaborately, perhaps a made up company or job title just to get you a steady paycheck. Your mind continues reaching and wandering down odd thought paths. You think, maybe it isn’t even a real job but a prank by a sister upset over childhood pranks of yore – despite her advantage in age, you had always had an upper hand over her as a youth. The rain was certainly a bad omen. You turn around, close the front door and begin to undo your tie. You. The following is a list of why I didn’t succeed more often:We will wake the kids - 54 timesIt’s too late - 15 timesI’m too tired - 42 timesIt’s too early - 12 timesIt’s too hot - 18 timesPretending to be asleep - 31 timesThe neighbors will hear - 9 timesHeadache or backache - 26 timesSunburn - 10 timesYour mother will hear us - 9 timesNot in the mood - 21 timesWatching the late show - 17 timesToo sore - 26 timesNew hairdo - 6 timesWrong time of the month - 14 timesYou had to go to the bathroom - 19 timesOf the 36 times that I DID succeed, the result was not always satisfying because 6 times you just laid there, 8 times you reminded me that there was a crack in the ceiling, 4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with, 7 times I had to wake you up to tell you I was finished, and once I was afraid that I had hurt you because you started thrashing around and breathing heavy. Let’s try to improve this, shall we??Love, Your HubbyTo My Dearest Husband,I think things are a little.
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