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I know you’re angry and sad and for that I am sorry, sorry for the pain I am causing you. I hoped you’d never get this letter. I want you to promise me something, the only thing I ask of you. I want you to move on, not right now but when you’re ready. I want you to have everything you’ve always wanted, and I want you to let someone give you what I’ve always wanted to give you, kids, love that will last you a lifetime, someone that you will warm you at night. Promise me you’ll laugh till your lovely cheeks hurt, promise me you won’t give up on life, promise you’ll love again. I know that’s asking a lot but in time I hope you will let this happiness happen to you. That’s all I’ve ever wanted, your happiness, yours alone was mine as well. I’m sorry I will no longer be there to warm you at night, to hear your laughter, to hear you sing, to watch your face light up when I walked through that door. There wasn’t a moment that I wasn’t thinking about you, and I loved you like no one I ever. When I returned to the kitchen Lydia had finished feeding the baby and had sent her to her room to play with her dolls and was cooking me some bacon and eggs. I sat down to drink my coffee and said,"Who is that for?" She said,"For you Dan. Please let me do this. You need to eat honey. It's the best thing for a hangover." I said,"I'm not hungry you fucking slut whore, and when I am I'll get my own food."Lydia turned the stove off and went to the kitchen door and told Joey to go outside to play awhile and then came over to sit at the kitchen table with me. She sat there for a minute with her head down looking at the floor and I could tell that she was trying to gather her thoughts. Finally she turned to look at me and there were tears in her eyes and her lips were trembling as she started to speak,"I know that I have no right to ask this of you Dan. I have done you a terrible wrong, the most terrible hurt that any wife could inflict on to her husband. If I could turn back the clock I.
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