Booby Big Ass Girl (old)

I felt a constriction in my heart and then a release. I was falling in love. Just like that, the pain of Kate’s betrayal, a dagger wound in my heart, faded. Fuck. I’d planned for a long period of rebound sex and general grudge fucking before I got serious again. The sushi rocked on a level I’d never experienced in my life. She had ordered well . After paying the bill - she insisted we go Dutch - we walked out and made that awkward pause you only make on early dates. Do I suggest another date or wait for a signal from her? Is she even interested? After an impatient pause she said, “I live a few blocks away, we can get on the J and...” she let her words trail off. Forward but still leaving room for a ‘no’ later in the evening. I looked over at the platform for the J train then back to her. “I really like you. So I’d like to take it a bit slower than... coffee at your place,” I said coyly. “Can I take you out tomorrow night?” She smiled without answering but grabbed my hand. “Come to. We ate rabbits and stuff from the garden grown wild, planted by Mom, cared for by God. Dad came back, gaunt, bearded, scars on his legs from shackles he said. Did Dad take care of us? We took care of Dad. We did love him and in his way, his very own way, we think he loved us. We knew, somehow, he loved Mom and died, slowly, without her. He loved us but we were not Mom. We had a milk cow and from age six I milked. The milk probably saved our lives. When Bessie died we were thirteen. I walked ten miles to the Aaronson farm and in the dark of the night stole one of their hundreds of milk cows. We named her Bessie – we thought all milk cows were named Bessie. ‘Cindy! Don’t ever, don’t ever let Bessie out in the daytime.’ I thought all cows looked the same but I didn’t know. Cindy didn’t either. We were clean. Some memory when we were young and Dad had fewer bottles: fill the washtub with hot water from the wood stove, temper – yes I knew that word and many others – the hot water with.
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