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"I got it here somewhere. I never heard of no ass tax before." It's a new government program, designed to reduce bureaucratic inefficiency as a result of the Hmmhmm-Frmmhmmhmm Act," I said as she let me into the house."Whatever," she said as I followed her back toward the kitchen of her cheap, untidy apartment.Her place, and its occupant, were perfect examples of Jerry Springer America--the apartment dominated by a TV, food plates sitting straight on the roughly upholstered couch, beer cans and one of the Left Behind novels visible just under it. While she--how may I describe her loveliness? Fat ass in a too-tight pair of white shorts leading down think trunk-like thighs to bare feet, sloping breasts hanging low over a broad belly under a Tommy Hilfiger T-shirt, stringy bottle-blonde hair and sunken eyes bespeaking little intelligence but, I sensed, enormous primitive enthusiasm in bed."Here it is," she said, holding my own crudely computer-generated document at me. "Are you sure. At 47, I was able to move into a small private community of folks of like means (comfortably wealthy, but not millionaires by any stretch). I could live happily on my business dealings. I made a living liquidating top end household appliances, especially refrigerators and TV’s that were “last years” models. New models come out and manufacturers have old stock to get rid of. I had the connections to move it and provide the instant cash so they didn’t have to hold the paper or store old goods. My customers were buying new goods at half the old price that they could still get top dollar for, and the key to all of it was cash deals. My customer was lined up before I made the deal, and then I had it shipped never having to touch it. Everyone was happy. Hucksters have tried to eliminate me and buy direct from my sources, but they find you can’t pick and choose goods, you buy ALL, including the things that aren’t “fashionable” that manufacturers were “stuck” with, but I found homes for.
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