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"Would you like to show me how good you can make me feel?" Well, I'd like to, but I'd like to understand why you'd want me to. You could have any guy in school, and most out of it. Why me?" I told you, you come highly recommended," she said. "Most of the guys that I've been with haven't done a particularly good job of satisfying me. I was complaining about that to some friends, despairing that there were no good men out there. One of my friends disagreed. I want to see how good you really are."I wasn't completely sure who she was talking about, but I had a damn good clue. "Who was this mysterious friend?" I asked."Uh uh uh," she said. "I can keep a secret too." So I'm supposed to redeem all of mankind, sexually speaking?" I asked."Are you up to the challenge, big boy?" she asked.I leaned in and kissed her. "So I'm on the line to prove my masculinity, and you are going to get a good fucking. What's in it for me?" Well, you get to fuck me!" she said in surprise, as if she was unable to. Very sincerely,Your friend and good customer,Elmo ThudpackerLetter 3 - A Hole New Bunch Of ProblemsDear Judge,It looks like the shit hit the fan for sure this time. I am on a new computer in the hole. That is what they call solitary confinement, you know. It seems that they can't take away my computer rights because I am having to prepare my own case because that fucking PD. (That's what they call the public defender, you know), that fucking PD couldn't defend a steak sandwich from one of those veggie guys. (Or is it veggie gays? I get that shit all confused.) Any was it was his fault about every bit of what happened!I tried to tell him about me and that female cop and how since she got in my bed, and she never said stop it wasn't rape to do her in the mouth that way. I mean after all, I am as sensitive as the next guy about all that women's lib crap. They just need a good horn dog stuck in them now and then and they would all of them straighten right out. But that PD, he is a real.
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