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She started out by subtly probing Alan about it when she had a brief private conversation with him just after brunch.But Alan had very little recollection of that part of the evening. Once he started asking her about what they'd done (since he thought he'd been with her, not Susan), she made an excuse to leave the room.His memory was similarly foggy about what had happened between him and "Elle." He thought it best not to mention Elle to anyone, not even Suzanne (ironically enough). He hoped he'd remember more if he gave it a little time.He kicked himself for not getting any contact information from Elle. Frankly, he'd gotten the impression that she was an easy lay, and would be a great fuck. He certainly thought she looked gorgeous. Despite all the sex going on in his life, he craved more actual fucking. However, he consoled himself by speculating that she was probably on vacation from France, so he wouldn't have been able to see her much more anyway.Susan remembered full well what. Cheryl, of course, could read Cal's reaction perfectly despite his best attempt to hide it. With an almost frantic hug, she told him "Honey, I'm sorry, but I'm not like you. I need a lot more support from people. It will kill me if I feel separated from Maddie and Sharon and Claire and Robin and the others by what I had to do."I know you felt that separation, that isolation years ago. I finally have an understanding of what you went through - and while you were so young! Sweetheart, I just can't handle it like you have. I need the people I'm close to sharing it with me."That really made Cal think. It was a bit of a shock to realize how well she understood him and how he had dealt with having killed. He also realized that he should not expect her to take the warrior way like he had. She was not a warrior at heart, despite her competitive spirit. She was an instinctive healer.The fact that it was virtually impossible for anyone to verify, to prove with evidence what had happened that.
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